Destroy target creature with reminder text. (Reminder text is any italicized text in parentheses that explains rules you already know.)
When this creature enters the battlefield, target opponent discards a card.
Whenever a player casts a spell without asking your permission while casting it, counter that spell. When a player asks you permission to cast a spell and you refuse, counter that spell and sacrifice Common Courtesy.
Whenever a 6 is rolled on a six-sided die, put a +1/+1 counter on each Chicken. (You may roll dice only when instructed to.) Tap an untapped Chicken you control: Roll a six-sided die.
If Cheatyface is in your hand, you may sneak Cheatyface onto the battlefield. If an opponent catches you right away, that player may exile Cheatyface. Flying
Flying At the beginning of your upkeep, sacrifice Carnivorous Death-Parrot unless you say its flavor text.
Spells you cast cost {1} less to cast. You must speak in a voice other than your normal voice. When you speak in your normal voice, sacrifice Bronze Calendar.
Flying At the beginning of each end step, if an opponent lost 3 or more life this turn, Augment {1}{B} ({1}{B}, Reveal this card from your hand: Combine it with target host. Augment only as a sorcery.)
As B.O.B. (Bevy of Beebles) enters the battlefield, create four 1/1 blue Beeble creature tokens. The number of loyalty counters on B.O.B. is equal to the number of Beebles you control. (Create or sacrifice Beebles whenever B.O.B. gains or loses loyalty.) [+1]: Up to X target Beebles can't be blocked this turn, where X is the number of cards in your hand. [−1]: Draw a card.
This spell costs {1} more to cast for each ten years you've been alive. Avatar of Me's power is equal to your height in feet and its toughness is equal to your American shoe size. Round to the nearest ½. Avatar of Me is the color of your eyes.
Whenever you cast a wordy spell, scry 2. (A spell is wordy if it has four or more lines of rules text.) {1}{R}, {T}: Choose target creature you don't control. Reveal the top card of your library. Alexander Clamilton gets +X/+0 until end of turn, where X is the number of lines of rules text on the revealed card. Alexander Clamilton fights that creature.
When this creature enters the battlefield, roll a six-sided die. You gain life equal to the result.
Whenever you cast a spell with a squirrel in its art, you get {A} (an acorn counter). Whenever a Squirrel you control enters the battlefield or dies, you get {A}. {2}{B}, Pay X {A}: Target creature gets -X/-X until end of turn. {G}, Pay X {A}: Target creature gets +X/+X until end of turn.
Whenever you cast a spell, note the first letter of its artist's name. If that letter wasn't already noted, put a +1/+1 counter on Abstract Iguanart.
Exile target attacking creature. Then remove it from the game. Then put it into the absolutely-removed-from-the-freaking-game-forever zone.